My name is Coral, and I've had an Abortion

As the first night of the Post Abortion Class drew closer, I found myself full of anxiety and fear; who would be in the class, what would they think of me, I had been in church leadership in one way or another for many years, would I still be allowed to do that once this was out? 


I had been telling myself that I had been forgiven, I had made amends to God, maybe I didn't need this class, and this was for woman who hadn't dealt with their sin. It was a struggle to bring myself to that first class, I would reason with myself as to why I did and didn't need to attend this type of class, but in the end I am ever so thankful that I did go.


The first night was the hardest, to be in that building, to have someone see me walk into that office where we were going to meet. But once I walked into that door of the building there was a relief of seeing others, some in leadership like me heading to different classes, doing what they needed to do with sin in there lives.  To take something from our past and maybe even our present and be able to give it to God, and say I can't do this on my own, I need help letting go. Regardless of when that sin occurs, as long as we hold onto it and never accept God's forgiveness, grace and mercy we will never be free from it. 


The things I learned in this class went far beyond just the healing from the abortion; it changed my life in how I deal with many things, regrets, grief and how I react to others who are struggling with sin and pain in their lives. When we get the chance to face challenges and come out on the other side we are changed, and working though the guilt, grief and pain will bring you to a new place in life.


When the availably of the class was announced we were not asked to sign up or make any public commitment that we were going to attend, so I  had no idea as to who would be there other than the gal leading the class and myself.  So with all my apprehension I walked into that room to find two other attendees who I could see were just as nervous as I was to be there. We all made brief introductions, I had seen these other woman at church, but really didn't know them, but this class would change all that. 


We spent a little bit of time talking about how we felt being in the class, given a book that we were going  to work through together and spent time reading the introduction of the book. There were flashes from each one of us that we wanted to bolt from the room, we were still not sure we were ready to face what we had done head on, but we all agreed to be back the next week with the assignment of reading and completing the exercises in the first chapter of the book. 


There were some tears shed that night and there would be many more as we painstakingly looked at the aspects around our choice. Hugs were shared as we departed and a very heavy weight had begun to lift, only slightly at that point, but it was lifting just the same. The hardest part was over; walking through that door and in front of those woman say "My name is Coral, and I've had an Abortion".